Squid and Potatoes

October 20, 2010 – 11:22 pm

Squid with Potatoes

Readers of this site have surmised by now that my love for squid and the eating of it has no visible ceiling. But, holy hell, I’ll be damned if fried calamari has not become the new chicken strip: a thinly veiled excuse to dip fried breading  in some faux-Ranch glop labeled aioli. AIOLI! If I never hear that word again, it will be too soon.

And, speaking of too soon, it’s only been a couple of weeks since I told you to braid your squid (scroll down and witness). Editorially speaking, I am the editor of this site, and I helm an agenda. If you can tolerate the pharmaceutical industry’s male enhancement agenda and its incessant suggestions that all men are wee, underperforming fellas at every television commercial break, you can tolerate me telling you to eat more squid. You gentleman may wonder, “Could I stand to be larger in that certain area?” Enough. Stop it. I ask you to wonder how much larger your squid intake could be. It’s a nutritious, cheap, underutilized source of clean, low fat animal protein, and you should eat more of it. Who knows? It might make you larger and more powerful in that certain area.

I digress. Here’s a simple, relatively quick preparation for a Mediterranean styled squid and potato amassment for two. Or three, depending on the size of your appetite.

Ingredients

2 large potatoes, large diced, boiled to tenderness
1 very large, ripe tomato, diced
5 cloves of crushed garlic
2 tbsp chopped fresh oregano
1 lb cleaned squid tubes and tentacles
olive oil
salt and pepper



Procedure

1. Heat approximately 4 tbsp olive oil in a wide, hot skillet until nearly smoking.

2. Add garlic and oregano, saute until garlic begins to brown.

3. Add diced tomato, saute until it begins to break down and get saucy. Season with salt and pepper.

4. Add squid tubes and tentacles, reduce heat and simmer one minute.

5. Add potatoes and toss the mixture. Taste. Season as needed.

6. Plate it up, drizzle a little more olive oil and squeeze some lemon juice thereupon.


Brine #486

October 17, 2010 – 2:34 am


I’d imagine that many of you are considering the cooking of a turkey sometime in the near future. Well, good for you. Here is the brine recipe for the turkey I’m cooking this coming week. I’ve parted this particular bird out, as I plan to oven roast some of it and smoke the rest (Actually, I’ve rotisseried the wings and am nibbling them as I write this). Howsoever you plan to cook your turkey, chicken or other meat, brining for a good 24 hours or more beforehand imparts wonderful flavor and juiciness, and also reduces the cooking time. This recipe was concocted for turkey, but I imagine that it would work nicely for a chicken or beef brisket as well.

Brine #486

Water – 3 gallons
Poppyseed – 1 tbsp
Mustard seed – 3 tbsp
Celery – 4 center ribs with leaves
Rosemary – 1 small sprig
Bay leaf – 4 leaves
Caraway seed – 1 tbsp
Parsley – 1/4 cup roughly chopped
Garlic – 15 cloves, smashed
Onion – 1 large, cut in eighths
Kosher salt – 2/3 cup
Sugar – 1/2 cup

Mix all ingredients in a large stockpot. Bring to a boil, then immediately reduce heat and simmer for one hour. Remove from heat and chill before brining meat or poultry.


Exciting New Restaurants

October 3, 2010 – 8:55 am

I’m ready to launch my empire of themed restaurants, and I’ve listed a few of them below. Each of these concepts has been thoroughly researched, and the menus developed at length. I can tell you, I’ve put a lot of heart and soul into laying foundations for this empire of hi-kwality foodstuffs, and it’s taking all of my powers of self-restraint to keep from revealing more details about the company’s overall strategy and goals – but the food will be unbelievable! I am accepting inquiries from serious investors, but please take the time to fully consider how amazing each of these places will be. I only want partners who believe in the product at least as much as I do. I’ll be opening the first locations of each of these in Portland, a city that totally gets adventurous eating, but I’m pretty sure word will spread and there’ll be locations in every state before long. Gosh, here goes!

The Soft-Boiled Eggery – Need I say more? Wink, wink!

Oh, Deer. – A romantic venison joint for couples only.

Catch Me If You Can! – All the fun of the petting zoo, all the freshness of the farm.

The Cat House – You probably shouldn’t come here if you’re afraid of getting your felines hurt.

The Knobby Knuckle – A boxing gym with a nightly fight card, serving only sausages made in house from all sorts of things.

Mysterious Dinner Theatre – Spend the entire evening interacting with our staff of actors to solve the mystery of what’s for dinner!

The Chum Barrel – A friendly seafood concern.

Now, if you don’t think you’re ready for making a big investment in the volatile restaurant industry, I totally understand. It’s scary out there! But if you believe in me and my concepts and would like to help me make my dreams come true, pass this post along to a friend. Who knows, maybe they’ll wanna jump on this amazing groundfloor opportunity to become my partner!